The first two years are very important after cystectomy and that's why such a close watch is kept. It's very unfortunate that your father's cancer returned, but as Tim said his youth is on his side. I know more than one person that has got years further after bladder cancer returned post-op (making someone stage IV). Statistics are odds and odds get beat all the time.
As far as good or bad cancer, it's all about whether it responds to treatment. Luckily there are treatments that actually help, it's just too bad we aren't able to predict it more accurately, so it still remains a gamble.
Where is the new tumor(s)? This plays a part in prognosis, with tissue invasion being less aggressive than if a major organ is invaded. Still, even liver mets can respond to chemo and allow someone to go on to get years of disease free survival, see
blcforum.com/cgi-bin/forum/YaBB.pl?num=1139501952
, and Diane's husband as one example.
It's a tough situation no matter how you look at it. I hope things go well for your father.
Wendy
Wendy