Rolin,
Two members here (at least) have been treated at U of M. I sent a note to both Andy and Humpy (Jim) to ask them to let you know about their doctors there.
Pat can probably give you some info on Konety and also if there are other doctors at Mayo who have a better bedside manner.
Sometimes, the doctors who are exceptional at surgery or some other specialty kind of suck when it comes to patient discussions. I found a similar situation when I went to MD Anderson. I didn't like the doctor after having to wait for 6 hours (the lights were out in hallways and all other rooms by the time he saw me) and then his bantor just put me off. Turns out the things he said wound up all being correct, but I decided to go elsewhere because I just didn't like him. Not sure if my situation would have been any better or worse if I stayed with him or not.
With that said, there certainly seem to be quite a few doctors who specialize in bladder cancer and are great surgeons (if it comes to that for you) who also have an excellent bedside manner.
I can say one thing. It sounds like you are doing all the right things! You'd be surprised how many folks have to be pushed and prodded and cajoled into getting to a top bladder cancer center. You've already done it and have the absolute right attitude about treatment.
I'm sure others will up and online later today and will respond with some great advice on doctors.
It does sound like BCG is the way to go given your current status. Great to hear that you did get the reTURBT already and as you can tell from the result, it was a darn good thing you did. You don't want to miss CIS if it is present and at least now they know. CIS responds well to BCG. Here is link to Dr. Lamm's website. He's pretty much the top researcher in BCG. You can also ask him questions on email and he is quick to respond.
BCG Oncology
Mike