Hi Aimeth,
This will be a very stressful time and a difficult time. It is very often difficult to make decisions, because you are under stress. I was in the same situation about a year ago.I cared for Hans, and only received hospice care, but here in Canada it wasn't a lot of actual care. At the end I got for a few days a night nurse. Hans never ended up in a hospice, because he became unstable and had to go to hospital. The last 10 hours he was put on "palliative sedation" and moved to the hospice unit. I am not sure if "palliative sedation" was dicussed with you and is possible in the States. Hans' mets had gone to his lungs and he was slowly sufficating, hence this decision.
Regarding his fear. It is very hard when fear takes over and controls you. You may like to sit with him and talk to him quietly that you always will be there and remember him about the good things he did in the past. May be that helps. Elizabeth Kuber-Ross has written some excellent books on it, but one of the things she adviced is sitting with him and holding his hand, and listen.
It is hard to let go, Aimeth, but it is also hard to see the suffering. I hope you will be able to think of him and be able to let go.
Try to get all the help you can, you need it, and it will help you to spend more time with him. Something I regret.
I wish you strength, get help from your doctor if need be.
Big hugs,
Renee