New Caregiver

Hi Lisa,

Just thought I would chime in and agree with Pat regaurding reasons to be positive with your Moms treatment. The cisplatin/gemzar chemo is best at bladder cancer. I think there are statistics coming in that support chemo before bladder removal to be optimum.
And as far as cancer treatment centers of america....please be sure to ask them how many diversions they do. They treated my breast cancer 7 years ago beautifully, so I spoke with them when I faced the bladder cancer. They would not give me any stats without agreeing to going there for 5 days of tests and consulting first. I declined treatment there and I don't regret it. How experienced your surgeon is will be very important - just keep that in mind.
There is hope and many here have faced tough odds and are doing well. I think Pat just hit 5 years with her pouch God Bless, Holly

Lisa, I agree with Pat she must have had a turb, did she go in the hospital for a in and out test? In order to stage it a turb is preformed. My husband was stage 3, he had his bladder removed,,no cancer in the lymph nodes and he is doing good. At 57 I think to the surgery will be good advice but of course her Doctors should be more positive about it, and advicing her, a second opinion is always a good idea as well, we only have one chance at this so best to make sure. Ginger

Lisa...if your mom had a biopsy she did have a TURB where they resection the tumor to determine stage and grade. The chemo she's on now is the gold standard for stage 3 and it may well destroy any cancer in the lymph nodes...she should opt for the surgery ..she's young and they will be removing a great many nodes during the cystectomy. These doctors should be giving her a little more hope at this point. WE have MANY on this forum with stage 3 and muscle invasive who are cancer free since their cystectomys. I'm one of them...5 yrs out. She needs a pep talk.......Pat

She has not had a turb. They did do a cystoscopy. The CT scan showed the tumor is almost through the muscle and the byopsy showed it's high grade. They told her that after her first round of chemo they will have to remove her bladder. She told us that she won't have the surgery if the cancer has spread through the lymph nodes. She contacted Cancer Treatment Centers of America and depending on what the PET scan shows, she wants to be seen by them. She's worried that if it's spread and she goes ahead and has the surgery, it will drasticly reduce her quality of life. She said if she's only got a short time left, she wants to be able to enjoy it.

My kids are 5,6,8,&10 and I'm keeping them on a need-to-know basis. They know that she's sick, but that's about it. My mom just turned 57.

Lisa,
We have another member, her name is Juliann, she also has a parent going thru similar circumstances. Look for her posts as we have been guiding her, trying to help. Juliann is 30 and her mom is 69, she has sisters and they are all in the same boat as you. I think most important is to remember she may be cranky and not herself, it may be because of her pain or just a side effect from dealing with this disease...how old is your mom.? I IMAGINE HAVING 4 KIDS OF YOUR OWN ITS VERY HARD FOR YOU TO KEEP AFLOAT!! And have a sense of humor too...as you have to when you have 4 kids..I always say take help from others if they ask, any friends, relatives who live near by, and take time for yourself, keep the kids on their schedules not to make them think things are unhappy and sad just different. I am waiting for your answers on bladder removal, if that was an option or not. and the results of the petscan..until then Ginger

Lisa,
Has your mom had a in hospital test called a "turb"? Thats where they go up and look in the bladder, remove any tumor, see if has invaded the muscle, and stageing is done by what they find when in there. THE PATH REPORT...Do they talk of removing here bladder at this point? oR HAS THAT BEEN DONE ALREADY?? Ginger