T1-G3 BCG failure update

Thank You for ur advice. At times I feel just overwhelmed with all this. In 8 years had 2 heart attacks (stents x4 now) thyroid cancer surgery, Barrett's RF Ablation x 3, Pneumoperitoneum with emergency Laparotomy, spinal surgery now this. As recover from 1 thing another says hello. Fear all the BCG & proposed Gemzar for 2 years will run me down so much surgery will be risky especially with the laparotomy residual issues. Do know that in the end surgery best bet for eradication. Haven't resources to use the name brand hospitals, will have use local in Arkansas but end of day we get what we can afford and access. Am 100% disabled Vietnam Vet and do have VA to turn to but prefer outside care for just wait time for VA likely not be accommodating. My doctors are good folks and must have trust in them but getting answers to questions in the 10 minute visits is difficult so turned this forum for information. Thank You

Diagnosed 25 months ago did TURBT with 6 weeks BCG and has returned tumor every 6 months.... just finished 3rd Turbt and started BCG but doctors stopped BCG after 2nd week due to 103+ temps and severe side effects. Also seems it's coming back faster. Have spoke of Gemzar. My question is just how bad/risky is the radical cystectomy surgery? For 2 years been constantly sick and TURBTS and no success. No chemo gonna cure this aggressive cancer and seems they are playing whack-a-mole at my risk. Is risk that surgery that great or just money in the treatment not the cure thing going here. If chemo never gonna work then me thinks waking up cancer free someday would be better then the containment program they like so much? What am I missing here. 68 yr old male with sketchy health. Also developed cystitis due to BCG and getting no treatment that. Advice or comments appreciated for am confused and getting frustrated.