Nice to meet you. I'm glad your husband found some solace by checking in here...
I've had cancer effect me from a couple of perspectives- as a daughter, my father died of it when he was 38 and I was 8; as a sister, one sister died the same year another was diagnosed, and then as a Patient? I hate that word...hmm. Well, as one on the receiving end as well. It was much easier when it was me getting that news than when I heard it was my sisters. For some reason I wasn't surprised or even that afraid.
When my sisters were dxed it was like the world caved in. I became quite obsessed with knowing the enemy (and this site is a direct result).
Thankfully, my husband is healthy and a lot younger than I am. I don't dare imagine 'what if' because it would be unbearable. It's much easier to be the one who is dealing, than to powerlessly look on.
I am soooo scared for Mr C. I find myself staring at him while he is sleeping and my heart literally hurts.
The one thing that has always been the most importatnt thing in his life and his lively hood is now a thing of the past. I hope someday he can return to working with wood and building other people's dreams. He has always basked in the delight of being a good provider.
I know it kills him everyday to sit idle and just dream of the things he wants to finish and things he wants to begin.
I am trying to take positive things away from this experience. Reading Mrs Billy's reflections of the past year makes me realize that in one year I will be writing hopeful passages for newly diagnosed people and their caregivers. There must be a reason we have been put in this awful situation.
I had almost started to learn to live with the unpredictability of the never ending MRSA infections and complications and then BANG! Add bladder cancer to the mix. I have told the Voo Doo spirits a million times that I surrender. Enough already.
Well Billy you are so lucky to have Silly and vice versa.....
I always feel people like you and Bubbles have the hardest time and my infinitely better half Lee has had the rough end of the deal too. She tries very hard to be upbeat but I know every time I go for a check she dies a little and she is terrified every time I have an op. that I might not walk out.
She hides it but it can't be easy! I merely HAVE TO do it to stay alive and staying alive can at times be very tunnel visioned and selfish which can be hard on partners - just so you know we appreciate just how hard a ride YOU are having.
The endless question - why all the strong, healthy, active, doers male and female - why not the muggers, rapists and low life political parasites? - So where was it written life is fair
The only proof in 10,000 years of inventing & worshipping gods that one exists - Just tell him youir plans >
Take care and good luck - we know the partners have a hard time even if we may forget to say thank-you sometimes :-[
To all those partners out there being taken foregranted :-* & a hug
Hi Guys! I am Wild Bill's wife. It's been a long hard scary ride. Billy and I have been living with this monster for almost a year now. In the begining, I was in complete denial. It wasn't cancer. It couldn't be cancer. What are those people talking about. Not my Billy. Ok.....he smoked for over 30 years, worked in construction for over 30 years. Other people have the same history without the big C coming into their lives. Then came the surgery. Scary Scary Scary situation. The doc came out and said that the cancer was very aggresive; but that he thought he got it all. "thought he got it all?" He said that he was "this close" to taking out the bladder. The days after were pretty scary as well. He was in pain but wouldn't take meds cuz he didn't want to get other issues going. I told him to drink lots of water to flush out all impurities, blood, etc. He said that it hurt. I told him that that was part of the flushing out procedure thinking of past bladder infections that I had going in the past. He came out of this chapter with flying colors. He has had 6 BCG treatments. Once a week for 6 weeks. Everytime he had a treatment, I went with him cuz he wasn't able to drive thereafter. I stayed with him every time. Three months thereafter, he got a clean bill of health from his Urologist. No cancer, clear, clear, clear. We were so happy. Doc says see you in three months. After that elation, the prospect of another scary episode is boding in my thoughts. To all of you, thank you for your support. Billy checks in with you every single day to see what is going with your lives. He truly cares and prays for your recovery. I guess we all need each other for support to fight this terrible foe. Thank you for your forum to get my thoughts in print. It's hard to keep everything to myself and smile and support the man I love. My thoughts and best wishes to you all, Silly.
Live in la.ca
5 great grandkids