Jjbrown,
As each of us starts our personal journey toward cancer - any type of cancer - we seem to share a constellation of experiences.
When first told we need additional test because we might have cancer, our minds go completely blank (or race too fast) preventing us from asking any questions.
Then, in a full panic mode we hit the internet, where we get scared by lists of symptoms and warning signs that demand our attention - some from posts by people who have a book or a magical cure they want to sell.
The first part of reality hits when we find that medical tests will be scheduled a month out, and that reports can take a week or two. Our doctor schedules a return visit in a month, and suddenly we panic again. "I have cancer, and suddenly the world is in slow-mo. Don't these doctors care about ME ?"
We convince ourselves that every ache and pain is a sign of the end, the cancer has spread and no one did anything to help. We are suffering from lack of information, and lack of an action plan. We do what people do best - we panic again.
Eventually, we complete an initial set of tests including things such as a CT Scan, a cyctoscopic exam, and a resection (fancy word for biopsy) of a suspicious growth(s). Then we get to wait on pins and needles for the pathology report to be delivered.
FINALLY, we have some REAL information that can lead to a diagnosis (maybe it is NOT cancer after all) and a treatment plan is developed. We are gung-ho to start, but there are more delays. The delays will never end, sorry to say.
At some point we come to realize that nothing happens fast - unless medical tests indicate a true emergency - then we want things to slow back down. We learn to accept the waiting for test results - some treatment results cannot be evaluated until weeks after treatment ends.
We start to return to a new state of normal. We report new symptoms at regular visits instead of leaving "urgent messages" with our care teams service in the wee hours of the morning. Our schedules get rebuilt around the current treatment plan. We can breathe again, and enjoy life. Our doctors are relieved that we understand, because s/he has three new patients in initial panic mode.
With bladder cancer, most of us find that standard treatments are HIGHLY effective at curing or controlling the disease, when found and treated early. Bladder cancer has the highest cost per patient (average basis) because we live so long and have so many treatment options available if needed.
As someone said to me on this board three plus years ago, "Slow down, adjust to a new normal". It was great advice; it was impossible for me to accept immediately, just like it is for everyone else.
We all need to learn, independently, that it DOES get better.
Best
Jack